The Fear of “Fitting” In

         I don’t necessarily mean “fitting in” where people like you, don’t like you or you are popular or not etc.  I’m awesome,…of COURSE people like me AND I’m popular .  I don’t even need to remind you all to laugh here, you already are! Really though, this entry is about “fitting” into things like rides at amusement parks, airplane seats, tight quarters where there are lots of people stuffed together such as elevators.  I have had this long living fear that I will go to either sit somewhere, get on a ride, try to squeeze in a spot and not be able to fit….that or worse, get STUCK!  I remember a few years back I was at one of my heaviest weights and I was at Six Flags Great Adventure with some friends.  Everyone wanted to go on the Runaway Train.  The entire day I spent not only sweating in the heat of summer but also dreading getting to the front of each line to see the size of the seats on each roller coaster.  I have always been a roller coaster junkie………..so for me this was very hard…..I’ve even had times when I would lie and say I wasn’t feeling well etc, just to avoid getting up to the ride and realizing I would have to squeeze my fat butt into a spot and be embarrassed and uncomfortable the whole ride.  Ok see I’ve gotten off “track” already, as I was talking about the Runaway Train ride………..I know I’m hilarious, right?  Ok so the train ride….waited in line forever…. Got to the front of the line and Chief and I tried to wedge ourselves together into the same car next to each other.  What the fuck were we thinking? It was impossible!  The attendant made me get up and move back a spot to sit with this skinny ass teenage boy.  How freaking embarrassing!  Right in front of our friends too!    Just this past summer alone we were in Wildwood and hubster and I decided we wanted to do the roller coaster that goes forwards then backwards……. We got in next to each other and it was the absolute most uncomfortable thing ever.  I think I spent the entire ride in pain because my hips were digging into the lap bar.  And let’s not forget about the bar that goes over your head….the attendant went to push it down and couldn’t push it down far enough so he had to leave it on a looser setting, and the entire time I was panicking that I was going to fall out of the rollercoaster seat in the upside down loop de loops and die a splattery, fat mess!  I’m actually still here, so for all of you who panicked for me when just reading that last line or two…no worries peeps,…here I am!!!!  The saddest part of all of this is the things I have been missing out on with my 4 year old Igor.  All the fairs and amusement parks we have been to and I’ve been to big to even want to try to go on the rides he begs me to go on with him. It has been very depressing to say the least since I will never ever get these years back with him.

 So in walked Isagenix into my life and is changing it for the better and forever. Not just for me but for Chief too.  We were living an extremely unhealthy lifestyle before.  Always tired, lazy, ate crappy food, etc.   Twenty-two pounds in 23 days later…this fat butt is getting smaller every day! ..By summer time this gal is getting on those little race car ride thingy’s with Igor and I’m gonna tear ass around the track with him, finally able to enjoy his childhood with him and no longer sitting on the side lines eating a cheeseburger !   I feel like a gagillion bucks………that’s right…that’s waaaaaaaaay better than a million people!  I’m building my team of rock stars joining in the crusade to becoming healthy and each of them are gonna rock it just like Chief and I are.  They may not be hilariously funny like me but none the less they are killin it!!!!  So today’s moral……….today is your day to change your life…not tomorrow..no more excuses.  As one of my Isa-buddies posted on her wall the other day….something along the lines of “it’s time to write your own story.  Stop giving someone else the pen!”  Before I was living to eat…now I’m eating to live…and feeling better than I ever have in my entire life.  For once I feel like I’m in control of my own story!!!!!!